“People who lack the clarity, courage, or determination to follow their own dreams will often find ways to discourage yours. When you change for the better, the people around you will be inspired to change also….but only after doing their best to make you stop. Live your truth and don’t EVER stop. –Steve Mariboli

This morning, the idea ‘Live Your Truth’ kept coming to me. To see what was emerging from inside of me, I went about my morning routine, letting thoughts, memories and images arise into my awareness, without reasoning them out. What I found is the inspiration for today’s post.

A memory came to mind. One day, my patient Susan said to me in a therapy session: “Dr. Khoshaba, my counselor friend Ms. P says you should not have discounted your hourly fee for me, because you are making it harder on other therapists to charge full fee for their services.”  I asked, “What do you think?” Ms. P’s comment was more about her relationship to Susan than it was to me, so it was important for Susan to explore its meaning with regard to that relationship.

But, Ms. P’s comment did not fall on deaf ears. Indeed, it struck a familiar but distant chord in me related to times in my life when I was more fearful of expressing what felt most true to me. In those days, a comment like this may have thrown me for a loop and caused me to question my actions. I may have adjusted what I felt was the right thing to do, and instead, gotten in line with Ms. P’s belief, living out her truth rather than mine.

I’ve rarely lacked the clarity, courage or determination to live my truth. And, I can say first-hand, living out your truth can bring out powerful forces against you. Nonetheless, you have to risk offending some people, if you want to express the real you in all that you do. The authentic life that you carve out for yourself will make up for any losses along the way.

By living out my truth, my life has continued to change for the better, no matter the bumps in the road along the way. Living my inner truth got me into the field of psychology, when some people discouraged my decision or turned my desire into something negative and silly. Living my inner truth gave me the courage to let my spiritual light shine as a psychologist, to unabashedly put forth the values of compassion, kindness, and generosity as vital to mental health and well-being. Psychology in Everyday Life is a result of letting my inner truth guide me, to give psychology away to every person who wants to know more about him or herself and how to live the best life possible, no matter their income, culture, race, and religion or life philosophy.

What Is Your Truth?

There are many sources of a truth. There are truths that we come to through learning and reason. We call these beliefs. The strength of a belief stands on the evidence we give for making it true.

But, there are also things we know that we haven’t learned or reasoned; there is no evidence for why we know it to be true. We just feel its truth deeply within us, requiring no further evidence or explanation. Some believe we tap into these types of truths from above and others from within us. No matter how these understandings flow to you, they help you to see what you need to do to live a more genuine and whole life. By Living Your Truth:

• You become more whole. When you let your inner wisdom guide your thinking, words, and actions, you are whole. There’s no split between what you truly are and who you show to the world. You are a seamless, whole self, daring to march to the tune inside of you. Now, you find work that most fits you and choose friends and life-mates who resonate with you on a deep psychological and spiritual level. Moreover, you begin to get fulfillment from simply being.
• You deepen psychologically. Psychological health is usually defined as adaptation to the standards and rules of behavior set by our legal, social, and religious institutions. Adapting to the beliefs and norms of a culture are important to survival and cooperation. But, if you don’t bring your own truth into this mix, you may end up feeling that life is quite ordinary. There is a way to live your own truth while at the same time adapting well to the norms of culture. Adaptation is a step in psychological development not an end in itself. For true fulfillment, you have to live out your true needs, desires and values in relationship, work, and all else that you do.
• You open yourself to spirit. Truths you come by intuitively express the spiritual part of you, either in word, action, or creativity.  You are following your own path so that you don’t have to push down, hurt, or eliminate others to achieve your purpose in life. I agree with the Viennese personality theorist Alfred Adler that we are capable of acting from energies that are not rooted in aggressive drives and instincts. Beauty and goodness are expressed in all you do, when you realize your true purpose, values and needs.

You don’t have to throw over your job, family and friends to start to live your inner truth. There are ways to express your inner truth in word, action and creative activities, without having to make radical changes in your life. The three action steps that follow will help you to start living your truth more fully today.

Action Steps for Living Out Your Truth

1. Think about a feature of you that really speaks to who you are, but may be unexpressed, because it doesn’t fit with the persona you show to the world. For example, my sister Deana loves music. In fact, if she had not become a child psychologist, she most likely would have become a professional musician. One day she called and said to me, “Now don’t think this is weird, but I’m going to start taking drum lessons.” Of course, I thought it was great.  Deana is not one to shy away from expressing her authentic self. But, still, she felt what many of us do when we act on an inner truth. We fear others will think us weird.

2. Counter fears, needs for approval, or lack of self-worth that is stopping you from living out your truth.

3. Now, see if you can begin to bring this part of yourself into your everyday life.  It may involve speaking your truth, or showing it through some action, or expressing your truth through some creative activity.

Choose to live a seamless existence where there is little difference between what you show to the world and who you truly are. Don’t let others discourage you from following your inner truth. Live it out fully, and don’t EVER stop.

If you like my post today, please say so by selecting the “Like” icon that immediately follows. I welcome your reflections and experiences. Here’s to a truthful way. Warmly, Deborah

Featured Image: Speak Your Truth By Jaymie Johnson